Titus Talks

by Craig Titus
Craig Titus

This column does not represent the opinions or views of IronMagazine, it’s advertisers or affiliates. Craig’s column is unedited and for entertainment purposes only, read at your own risk.
As a well known ladies man, can you describe the wildest night out you can remember?

Wow, where do I start? Which night out do I consider the wildest and what distinguishes one night being more wild ten another? Ok, so let’s break it down…is it a more wild evening if there’s three girls involved, or possible more wild if both of the ladies are married, or is it more wild if a wealthy business man pay’s me a tidy sum to bang his young trophy wife while he watches? I honestly don’t think I can refer to one specific night being the wildest…there are more fantasy evenings then I could even remember. For example, you have the time Chris Cormier I and competed at the Australian Grand Prix.

We ended up partying and smoking some weed with a few of the locals following the show in there hotel suite. These’s something utterly irresistible about a gorgeous blond groupie with and Australian accent. After passing around a couple fat blunts and doing some of australia’s best ectasy, I ended up going back to my room with a dime piece. She had long true blonde hair and the most beautiful green eyes, absolutely gorgeous. Apparently this beauty was a well known bikini model for a Australian sun tan lotion company. So we’re sitting in my room and this girl, we’ll call her Mary, begins to tell me she lives with her girlfriend, they’re a exclusive couple and guilt in beginning to set in. Mary tells me she’s totally into her girlfriend but she has seen me in quite a few magazines and has always wanted to do me. I’m a nice guy, and I’m thinking it would be very rude of me not to “oblige” her, so being the gentleman I am, I made a suggestion. Why don’t you simply call your girlfriend, let her know the situation and see what she thinks. You don’t have to inform her you are already in my room, you can say we met at the show and you’re fantasizing about the two of you using me as a play toy…who am I not to “oblige” them, to be honest, I never for one second thought the girlfriend was going to go for the idea, Mary and I were going to “oblige” each other regardless. All I can say is, Christmas came early that year!! Not only did the girlfriend agree to the proposal, she was so enthusiastic that she brought little catholic school girl out fits for Mary and her to wear and already set her mood with a couple hits of ecstasy. Since Mary since Mary hadn’t been to my room yet, she met girlfriend in the lobby, my phone rang and gave them the room number…thank you Santa!! Girlfriend is another blonde, but is a very naughty girl with tattoo’s all over her arm and around her lower back. Now the reason I’m emphasizing the fact these ladies were naughty, is because not only were they wearing the school girl outfits, I was soon informed both were bad in school and school and needed a spanking. Motha Fuckin Santa Claus is awesome!! And of course, being the gentleman I am, I’ll most certainly “oblige” them. So many lies over my lap first. The girlfriend kneels at my side behind Mary’s assets. I find myself sitting in chair, with Naughty Mary across my lap, girlfriend lifting her shirt and telling daddy, apparently that was me, to spank her because she received a “F” on her test. “spank me Daddy’ Mary says, God damn right I’ll spank you!! Let me also point out, at that point in my life, I was seasoned and experienced spanker for years. Debee Halo was my girlfriend for a couple years and she always seemed to get bad grades…in her school girl outfits. Anyway, both naughty Australians got punished, girlfriend even helped Daddy out in spanking Mary and I ended up “obliging” each other that night and well into the next day. I’m not sure if that night or 36 hours was the wildest I can remember…but I can say, it was one of the most memorable. For the record, my buddy Chris Cormier was in his room with two Aussie’s himself. That’s how that’s how we did it back in the day!

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Craig Titus

Craig Michael Titus was born in Wyandotte, Michigan on Jan 14, 1967. The eldest of Michael and Sandra Titus’ three children. In high school, Craig wrestled for his school team at 132lbs. After graduation, decided to put on some muscle via weight training. When Craig graduated from high school he was 5’6″ and 140lbs. By the age of 21, he was 5’9″ and 185lbs. Once he started weight training and seeing results, he was hooked. Craig’s first bodybuilding show was the 1988 Houston Bodybuilding Championships in which he won the Men’s Open middleweight class and the overall title.

Competitive Record

2002 Mr. Olympia – 11th
2002 Night of Champions XIV – 5th
2002 Southwest Pro – 7th
2001 British Grand Prix – 9th
2001 Mr. Olympia – 12th
2001 Arnold Classic – 6th
2001 SAN FRANCISCO GRAND PRIX – 2nd
2001 IRONMAN PRO INVITATIONAL – 5th
2000 Toronto Pro – 1st
2000 Arnold Classic – 10th
2000 Night of Champions – 11th
2000 Ironman Pro Invitational – 8th
1996 NPC USA Championships — 1st Heavyweight and Overall
1995 NPC USA Championships — 2nd Heavyweight
1994 NPC National Championships — 2nd Heavyweight
1994 NPC USA Championships — 2nd Heavyweight
1993 NPC USA Championships — 4th Heavyweight
1991 NPC Ironman/Ironmaiden — Overall
1990 NPC Tournament of Champions — 3rd Heavyweight
1990 NPC Western Cup — Overall
1989 NPC Houston Bodybuilding Championships — Overall
1988 NPC Houston Bodybuilding Championships — 1st, Middleweight and Overall

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